2015

HELLLLLOOOOOOOOOOOOO EVERYONE!!

I haven't posted for like seven months. I feel like I should be in my room (which someone is now living in and I'm not happy about it) in Astor writing this since I have only ever posted one thing in the states. A lot has happened since May, but I'll give you the readers digest version of it. I finished my year at Plymouth University, traveled a bit with my mom and cousin Teresa, moved home, started working for my dad full time again, went to New York, Colorado, Vegas, Baltimore, and Vegas again, and finished one of the most difficult semesters of my college experience. Time has seriously flown by and I am completely exhausted. 

My last few weeks in Plymouth were great. In April I was at a point where I wanted nothing more than to go home, but once it came time to leave it was seriously difficult. I loved my time there and I love everyone that I got the chance to get to know while I was there. I miss it every single day and I cannot wait until I get to go back. 

So. 2014. It's over. I kinda can't believe it. But overall, I'm excited for 2015. I've never ever been able to keep up with New Year's Resolutions, but this year I am going to try to keep up with a few (or seven) that aren't ridiculous like eating less chocolate (because we all know that I am not capable of giving up chocolate).

1. DO MORE OF WHAT I LOVE

I want to read at least two books a month, watch movies all the time, play with my millions of cats, take long naps, hang out with my parents, drink with my close friends, continue getting tattoos, and just have fun. Over the summer I was DD for my dad and I went to a party with him. One of the women ended up sitting next to me and she started asking me questions about what I go to school for, what I like to do, where I work, all the questions college students are asked on a regular basis. When I told her that parties really aren't my thing, that I was just here to be with my dad and that I'd rather be at home reading a book or something, she told me that I was not living my life correctly, that I needed to get out and meet people, do more things, and just "be a college kid." Now I can kind of see where she is coming from and every once in a while I do like to get out there and participate in the real world, but I do not understand why doing the things I love doing makes my way of life incorrect. I am definitely not a people person so the stereotypical college lifestyle is not appealing to me in the slightest. This party was in July and I'm still pissed about it. Over the last year I have tried really hard to not judge anyone that has opinions, likes, dislikes, that are different from my own, just because something is not appealing to me does not mean that it is wrong, to me that is beyond stupid. Having talked to her for only about five minutes before she told me this made me decide that I am going to do the things that I like to do simply because they make me happy. I am not going to put myself in situations that make me uncomfortable just so others will like how I'm living my life a bit more. Make sense to you? Because it makes a hell of a lot of sense to me. I'm also going to stop calling things "guilty pleasures" because you know what? I DON'T FEEL GUILTY FOR LOVING THE THINGS THAT MAKE ME HAPPY. Twilight? One Direction? Taylor Swift? Harry Potter? Cardboard standups? I LOVE THEM ALL AND THERE IS NOTHING YOU CAN DO TO STOP ME.

2. DON'T BELIEVE EVERYTHING SOMEONE TELLS YOU ABOUT YOURSELF

Since I was in jr. high, I have been told that I am socially awkward and for years I actually believed it. I believed that I didn't know how to speak to people and that I was unable to carry on a full conversation. In the last year I have learned that I am not socially awkward, that I am capable of getting to know someone, and I can ask questions without getting all weird and uncomfortable. I care about how others are doing, I want to know about people's lives and figuring all of this out has made me a much more confident person (although if I don't know you I am still a shy and quiet girl).

3. SPEND TIME WITH PEOPLE WHO ARE A POSITIVE INFLUENCE ON MY LIFE

In the last few months I have had to cut someone out of my life. I hadn't known this person very long, but after the happiness of the new friendship had worn off, they had become a toxic influence. I was very unhappy if I was talking to this person and when I wasn't. They made me feel awful about myself and only wanted me around if it was convenient for them. I was a very unhappy person and no matter what I was losing. Cutting this person out of my life was difficult and it still makes me sad sometimes, but I am happy to report that since I have no longer been in contact with this person, I have been in a much better place. I have been a lot happier and it has allowed me to get closer with the fantastic friends that I do have. This whole situation has taught me that I need to hang out with people that do not make me miserable. Lately, I have been doing just that and man, do I feel great. I love having friends that enjoy doing the same things I do. I love having parents that I can do things with. I want 2015 to be filled with these awesome people and I don't want to be down in the dumps again.

5. EAT BETTER AND KEEP UP WITH P90

I know this one sounds like a stupid generic resolution that everyone says that they are going to do, but then after a day they give up entirely. But I had started this then completely lost it in the middle of the semester when all four of my classes dumped on me. It wasn't until my last final was finished that I was actually able to breathe again. Now, I want to start eating better and continuing with P90. P90 is like P90X but made for people who are out of shape, like me. You work out six days a week and you eat right (with the exception of chocolate for me because I can't not eat chocolate). I just want to like what I look like and feel good about it, you know? I don't want to do it for anyone but me. I want to love the skin I'm in.

6. APPRECIATE EVERYTHING MORE

I feel like I don't say "Thank you" enough. I know I really try to do this in like restaurants and stores already (it probably gets annoying the number of times I thank a server or a cashier, but I really do appreciate what they are doing) but I don't think I appreciate my family or friends enough. I know I don't thank my parents enough and it's awful. I love my mom and dad the most in the entire world and I need to tell them or show them more. I need to let my friends know that they are the best and that I don't ever want to live without them. I think I do give my cats the most love, but that's because they are so furry and cute that I can't not hug and love them. I have so much to be thankful for, I just don't know how to let it all out.

7. WRITE MORE

I want to write more. What I really want to do is write a book. I think I have a long ways to go on that, but I want to give it a shot. I think the best way to start this one is to consistently post on here. Whether anyone reads it or not, I think it'll be helpful. So far, the two people I have talked to about writing a book have been supportive (thanks Mom and Sarah!) but who knows what I would write about. 

I think that's going to be all for now, I have to get up and take my mom somewhere at the buttcrack of dawn (okay, it's 7:45, but that's like 20-30 minutes earlier than I usually leave my house, so I am going to be a walking zombie). I hope you all have a wonderful 2015 and I will talk to you soon :)

<3 Jes

P.S. What should I rename my blog? I don't really know. I guess I could leave it Jessica J's One Direction to the UK, but I don't think it fits as well anymore. Give me some feedback??